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On mommy’s agenda for me today: getting dressed going to school eating dinner bath bedtime. Um, no. I will not be doing any of that. At least, not with any discernible amount of ease. GETTING DRESSED I know that I…
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I had all the time in the world before I had kids. I had no IDEA how much free time I had, how much time I wasted doing literally nothing. Now, free time is counted in the gaps between moments,…
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Saggy breasts. Tummy pooch. Thunder thighs. Tiger stripes. I think – I know – there was a time in my life that these things would have really bothered me. In fact, I remember times – pre-motherhood – that I thought…
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For me, the most annoying part of parenthood has nothing to do with how to raise my children and everything to do with everyone else’s opinion of how to raise my children. I’d be giving my baby a bottle, and…
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Recently, I asked for help. That is to say, I hired help. Once every two weeks, she comes to clean my home from top to bottom. This morning, she eagerly volunteered to clean out my fridge. I can’t stress this…
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I’ll admit it – before kids I took a hard line on things I knew nothing about. I read a lot of books, I watched a lot of movies, I had everything figured out. I used words like “never” and…
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Teething is no fun for anyone. The bub suffers and screams and squirms. There is drooling and rashes and fevers and erupting gums. Seriously, who thought of this? It’s barbaric. I’m really not sure about anything working – from…
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Why is it that no one tells you how expensive child rearing is? I think the cold hard truth is purposely kept from the public so that we continue to have a kid – even more than one – without really…
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Paraskevidekatriaphobia. Sounds like something my kid coughed up, but it’s actually the technical name for fear of Friday the 13th. Irrational. Completely. I know people love their superstitions, but I was born on a Friday the 13th (August, mark it…
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Every once in a while, I let my kids watch TV. Not too much, mind you, just long enough to let me have (at least) one glass of wine, run a load of laundry and take an uninterrupted phone call….
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Every year around Mother’s Day, I get a bit weepy. My husband goes to great lengths to remind me that we need to celebrate me, because I’m a mom, but Mother’s Day really hurts. I lost my mom in 2001….
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